E–pub/Pdf Shades of Milk and Honey

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N in the entire ucking shire the English shire not the Middle Earth Shire although it would be pretty epic if there were an Elven PP I would watch the shit out of thatJane has a doting ather and a ussy mother who does nothing but whine and gossip and worry about her daughters marriage prospects I m shocked Their estate is entailed in avor of a male relative Such wonder Such surprise A new neighbor has moved in a Mr Dunkirk No He is a kind handsome young gentleman reserved and polite I never He has a young very shy little sister named Elizabeth 16 years old and not yet debuted Oh my whom he dotes on Said beloved sister is so beloved so protected because she HAS A DARK DEEP SECRET DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUUUN I WONDER WHAT THE SECRET COULD BEThere s a young charming handsome military man named Livingston who gambles and lirts who might or might not have a dark dastardly wascally wabbit secret There s a dark brooding man named Mr Vincent who does nothing but sneer ok he might belong in Jane Eyre instead if our beloved Rochester has the personality of a moldy potato and none of the good looks and you might recall Rochester was never much of a looker to begin withIt depends on which BBC production you watch of course but I d rather not give the dude in this book the benefit of the doubtSo the love uckery I mean you could call it a love triangle but again I m in a pretty ucking oul mood right now You would be too if you read 300 pages of nothingJane admires Captain Livingston while secretly in love with Mr Dunkirk who admires Jane but shows all the attention to Melody who lirts with Dunkirk and Natural Blonde flirts with Mr Vincent andlirts with Captain Livingston hell anything with a penis who s not her ather oh right it s a Regency I m not supposed to say the word penis Or tampon now that I think about it Or curse Crap Vincent doesn t give a uck about anyone and snarls at Jane while showing shewing attention upon Melody Livingston is lirting with Melody while choosing chusing chuzing Make up your mind ucking book to bestow his attention upon another SECRET YOUNG LADY WHO HE REALLY SHOULDN T BE SEEING I wonder who the mysterious very young very off limits lady could be11And in the middle of all this magic glamour is used to decorate everything and to make things pretty and sparkly and brightAch mein headThe Fucking Language Be Land of a Thousand Hills: My Life in Rwanda fucking consistent It tries tooucking hard This book tries to use the antiuated language of Austen days which would work EXCEPT IT ONLY DOES SO WHEN IT FEELS LIKE ITShew shewed shewn AKA Show showed shown Here written as shewn or the entire ucking book except when the author orgets to do so SHEW SHEW SHEW SHEW GAAAAAAAAAAAH IT PISSED ME OFF SO MUCH Beth was out of sorts however and the enthusiasm she had shown before dinner seemed to be smothered under a layer of melancholy vs They were shewn to the library with Jane s mother accompanying them as chaperonChuse Choose is written as chuse chuse chuuuuuuuuuuse except when the modern orm is used She would not have chosen to meet him next in this mannerTeaze Surprize Really what was the If My Love Were a Fire Truck: A Daddy's Love Song fucking point The ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ 45 starsPerfector Write It When I'm Gone: Remarkable Off-The-Record Conversations with Gerald R. Ford fans of Jane Austen that want the addedlair of magic The characters Ready for Summer fill the typical Austen tropes with their own spin A lovely storyor any an of the Regency period So there were many nice things in this book The Austin esue plot was interesting and the main character and her relationship with her sister was layered I really think the character was well drawn and the best thing about the book #Her POV as the plain sister was written rom a very #POV as the plain sister was written A coerência textual from a very placeI guess I just achedor a bit complexity with the plot and romance and the world building There s some VERY interesting magic conceits here and I just wanted a bigger scope I think the author could build upon this world Write Your Novel!: Tips from a Bestseller for and interesting books This one was a nice basic intro I think the plot just needed twists and there needed to be MORE characters to act as red herrings to make the ending a bit surprisingI will read another by her though def I love Jane Austen and I loveantasy so you would think this book which mixes the two would be right up my alley especially since it was written by a Hugo Award winning author Can t miss and yet somehow it does Superficially it s a very Austenesue tale but it lacks most of the wit charm and complexity of Austen Jane is the plain older sister with all the talent in the Dogs Behaving Badly family art music and magic But at age 28 sheeels like she s First Year Teacher: Wit and Wisdom from Teachers Who'€ve Been There fated to become a spinster and she spends most of the book struggling with her insecurities Frankly it got pretty tiresome Melody is her lovely 18 year old sister who doesn t have any particular talents They love each other but each is deeply jealous of what the other sister has that she lacks And they ve both developed a tendreor the same eligible gentleman Mr Dunkirk who lives on A EstateIt S Interesting That The Use Of Magic estateIt s interesting that the use of magic glamour in this world seems to be limited to creating visual illusions In most ways it s simply another ladylike talent like drawing singing or playing piano that well bred young women are expected to develop However there s a Mr Vincent who moves into the neighborhood who is truly an accomplished artist with his glamour illusions Jane wants to learn rom his talent and magical works of art but the two of them get off on the wrong April 16th: Virginia Tech Remembers foot and develop a relationship that s prickly at bestThis struck me as simply a young adult novel or maybe a simple young adult novel I thought it was okay but on the shallow side I had no probleminishing it but I was hoping or so much Maybe I ll go re read Jonathan Strange Mr Norrell. Hreatened she inds that she must push her skills to the limit in order to set things right and in the process accidentally wanders into a love story of her ownThis debut novel Mindful Living with Aspergers Syndrome from an award winning talent scratches a literary itch you never knew you had Like wandering onto a secret picnic attended by Pride and Prejudice and Jonathan Strange Mr Norre. E art of subterfuge and seeming are they notWell not Jane She s conflicted about using Glamour and refuses to make herself seem pretty than she is while also being rather talented than the rest of heramily Sure its a common thing to know and use Glamour in the Regency era Didn t you know Magic is real and no only can you create wonderful murals and play wonderful music without the gross aids of base paints or the piano orte but it also gives us a tapestry to work out our own personal dramas How delightfulI ve always liked stories that bring up the conflict between lies and bringing orth truth rom them Passion and the heart were always best served through iction and not stark reality As an opener into the series it serves delightfully as a simple romance with silly girls getting into trouble and eligible men causing so much pain and ruckus sigh But this is the nature of reality sigh The novel isn t the most brilliant that I ve read and it s simplicity serves the magic than the other way around and that s Space Kid fineStill don t trust the blurb that this is much like the books listed there Think Urban Fantasy meets Regency Romance and you ll beine This was an incredibly Circumstantial Evidence: Death, Life, and Justice in a Southern Town frustrating book The charm of Austen lies in the style of writing light witty insightful elegant and able to skewer Regency life at a moment s notice And while Shades of Milk and Honey makes sure to pack in plenty of Regency manners and swooning the writing style is so jarring that I ended up reading passages aloud to other people just to confirm that they really did make no damn senseThe author reuses words at an amazing pacereuently the same word is repeated in back to back sentences sometimes three or our times in a paragraph Worse sometimes the author uses words she clearly doesn t understand droll or instance is applied to a completely humourless character multiple times and appears to have been confused with a word that means curt or short instead of amusing Sometimes she uses the archaic spelling of a word chuse sometimes she uses the modern spelling Occasionally she ll use a word that is archaic and proceeds to misuse it nuncheon does not mean lunch repeatedly When you combine these bizarre word choices with laboured sentences that are borderline incomprehensible the experience is like thumping down a stretch of rapids instead of Austen s effortless babbling brookThe plot doesn t even get started until halfway through at which point I already hate Brat and Doormat which might as well be the names of the central sisters Most of the characters in this book are so glaringly based on well known Austen characters that it seems too obvious and I waited in vain Every Drop for Sale: Our Desperate Battle Over Water for the twist that would make them new and exciting No such luck if anything they were stripped of all endearing ualities and hammeredlat into one dimensional puppets The magic elements are explained in detail but are completely incidental to the story By the end we ve given up all pretense of being in an Austen novel and have stumbled into some sort of uasi Gothic adventure scene I was just so happy to have gotten to the last pages I didn t even care anyI bought the book because I love Austen and many Austeny spin offs and because I thought the conceit of magic being a womanly art was pretty cool But now I m just wondering what the hell reviewers #were thinking in recommending this read Having done a little digging it looks like Kowal is the VP of the #thinking in recommending this read Having done a little digging it looks like Kowal is the VP of the Fiction and Fantasy Writers of America I can t help but wonder if the circles she moves in has caused her writing to be overrated as I have no idea why this particular book merited the sort of publicity push it s currently experiencing I wish I hadn t read it This book is like Jane Austen s works in the way that a genetically modified out of season greenhouse tomato is like a cherry Sure they re technically both classified as ruits They re red They re juicy looking They re attractive The difference is that when you bite into said GMO tomato it tastes like mealy mushy tasteless crap This "Book Is The Euivalent Of "is the euivalent of limp tasteless slice of tomato on a McDonalds hamburger Why bother You re just going to pick it off and throw it away anyway Or maybe that s just me I hate raw tomatoesThis book tries way too hard The main character is a doormat Her love interest is not so much Darcy as he is Jane Eyre s Rochester yes I know they re not by the same author played by a 9th grade drama student with aspirations of playing Heathcliff whose inspiration or Heathcliff yes I know that s yet another book comes rom The Simpsons Ned Flander s

portrayal of stanley 
of Stanley in A Streetcar Named Desire I KNOW THEY RE ALL BY DIFFERENT AUTHORS THAT S NOT THE FREAKING POINTSorry or all the literary references Not really I m just in a Troubled Waters fucking bad mood right now after reading this book and I don t care The characters are extremely similar to Austen s with none of the complexity resulting in characters that are predictable and dull The language is both pretentious Shew Shewed Chuze Chusing and inconsistent There is no sisterly love Expecting Elizabeth and Jane Don t hold your breath It s like Fanny and Lydia I KNOW THEY RE NOT IN THE SAME BOOK1111 There s noucking point to the magic None It s literally ucking window decoration There s no explanation Poof Magic sparkly dragon airy dust everywhere and hidden glamour strings being pulled out of thin air like a used ucking tampon string within some invisible emale unicorn What s the ucking pointThe Plot We re in Jane Austen era England Hooray Our main character is named Jane Hooray She has a sister a beautiful beautiful beautiful sister named Melody the loveliest maide. Evolve around vying or the attentions of eligible men Jane resists this ate and rightly so while her skill with glamour is remarkable it is her sister who is air of Owls: Birds of the Night face and therefore wins the lion’s share of the attention At the ripe old age of twenty eight Jane has resigned herself to being invisibleorever But when her Bon Bon Voyage (A Carolyn Blue Culinary Mystery, family’s honor is Full review now postedThis was absolutely delightful Fantasy of manners is a subgenre that I didn t realized I needed in my life I ve read books that technicallyit the genre such as the Infernal Devices trilogy by Cassandra Clare and Alison Goodman s Dark Days Club but those both Bon Bon Voyage felt like YA than anything else Because they are This was myirst experience with an adult antasy of manners and I loved itFantasy of manners is basically if Jane Austen had included magic in her writing And that is exactly what this book was So much so in act that some people ound the novel too derivative of Austen to merit enjoyment I beg to differ I picked this up because I wanted to see what an Austen novel would eel like with magic involved and that is exactly what I got While there were a ew variations that plot line and characters were remarkably similar to the amous cast of Pride and Prejudice but it was so well written and the characters so well developed that it A Look Over My Shoulder: A Life in the Central Intelligence Agency felt like an ode to Austen than a plagiarism That s my take at least The writing was perfectly lovely andelt exactly like it sprang rom Austen s pen I ve never read a Regency inspired novel that elt this true to the original writings that inspired them and I ve read a good many Regency novels The prose never Ravishing Ruby felt too heavy or like the author was trying too hard to mimic her inspiration It was convincingly Regency yetelt resh at the same time One of the loveliest aspects of this novel was the magic system In this alternate Regency era glamour is another of the womanly arts that eligible bachelorettes in search of a husband are expected to deftly produce This glamour is a weaving of the magical energy alive in the air Glamour can be applied to music allowing it to loop after being played or producing colors and shapes that complement the tune It can also be applied to paintings and rooms brightening them and adding life But the most impressive use of glamour is ound in the production of glamurals living artwork that engages all ive senses These glamurals are usually attached to rooms and can remain as long as the room survives Working a convincing glamural is the epitome of success or an artist be they male or Old Yeller female However there s a catch working too much glamour can leading to chillsainting or even death in extreme cases This makes glamour the most dangerous of the womanly arts but the respected as wellWhile this is the Flying by the Seat of My Pants: Flight Attendant Adventures on a Wing and a Prayer first book of a series Shades of Milk and Honey is a perfectly self contained story giving readers aull story with a satisfying conclusion It makes a wonderful standalone novel if you happen to be looking Lincoln: An Illustrated Biography for something to provide a breakrom the trilogies and series that On Being Human: Reflections on Life and Living fantasy novels always seem to come in If you love Jane Austen and magic I can t recommend this highly enough And if you need a book that is hopeful and has a happily ever after ending this novel is a breath ofresh air Original review can be Frommers Irreverent Guide to Walt Disney World found at Booknest This very talented writer has written a Regency romance thateatures a ew of Jane Austen s spellings adding in a truly nifty magical system Unfortunately the magic seems little integrated with the world having almost no impact on the culture The comparison with Jane Austen might sell books but that s also kind of a high bar This story eels like a Regency romance without much books but that s also kind of a high bar This story eels like a Regency romance without much Austenesue irony or complication of character on the other hand it is not a retread of Georgette Heyer which gains major points or me as a reader Not that I dislike Heyer or the re invention of the silver Who's There on Halloween? fork sub genre I just would like to see authors venture outrom under Heyerian influence a tadThe story takes time to warm up and there are many period glitches but I don t think and there are many period glitches but I don t think will be noticed by readers who aren t conversant with period literature but when it Jurisdiction finally gets going there is a lot of comedy of manners identity mixed with magic thrown in to make it roll along I thought the climactic scene humorously cinematic though the ending rushes upon the readers a bit especially considering the sedate start Thank you brian tanabeHave you ever slapped someone good and hard I can still remember the one and only time I did the anger boiling up and over the near involuntary windup of the arm and spring loaded swing through the crack of the hand on the offender s cheek the numb and then sting in the palm the blipping rush of incredible satisfaction instantaneouslyollowed by a gushing of Hip Pocket Sleaze: The Lurid World of Vintage Adult Paperbacks fear and guilt Yeah Itelt good and solid before the last Mookie: Life, Baseball, and the '86 Mets fear and guilt part I still remember all thatrom when I slapped the little brat who was bigger than me in preschool when I was our This bo Good God I resent this book so much or not being awesome Georgette Heyer put me in the mood Clawback for another regency and combine that withantasy SoldI want a refund The Heyer danced along sparkly with charm this book plodded leaving me with an overwhelming sense of claustrophobia and boredom at the shallowness and banality and insipidity of well to do country life The conversation didn t sparkle wittily it clunked And the heroine was rankly too stupid to keep breathingMostly though I resent the #muddle The magic here is glamour a womanly art of illusion used largely or entertainment It is both dismissed and underestimated #The magic here is glamour a womanly art of illusion used largely Sugar in the Raw: Voices of Young Black Girls in America for entertainment It is both dismissed and underestimated by men Hello metaphoror the entire practice of upper class Cooking for Company female husband snaring existence But Kowal seems to have no real control over that and the overlapping stories of lies and truths are a mess With a vapid little lesson about how real art reuires passion plunked on top Feh Romance and Regency go hand in hand but then so does ArtAll the most talented ladies are skilled in th. Shades of Milk and Honey is an intimate portrait of Jane Ellsworth a woman ahead of her time in a world where the manipulation of glamour is considered an essential skillor a lady of uality But despite the prevalence of magic in everyday life other aspects of Dorchester’s society are not that different Jane and her sister Melody’s lives still

review ☆ eBook, ePUB or Kindle PDF Ð Mary Robinette Kowal

 Shades of Milk and Honey